Just a thought…

It’s an interesting moment. I’m surrounded by people and yet alone. Lots of people saying lots of things but I’m not included. Makes you think how those who are depressed or separated might feel. Not good.

Oh yes!!! I love you Sid Meier!

God Bless you John William Suter!

I’m listening to this track and I am reminded of my late grandfather, the awesome John William Suter, an truly exemplary human being and times I spent with him in the little lean-to shed up against the pantry at the rear of the house on Gertrude Road in West Bridgford. The old tools, the bits of wood I was allowed to bash nails through and sometimes an old Roberts radio softly playing in the background. Time may pass but such love lasts forever. His memory is so precious and beyond value. I truly miss him. God bless you Mac wherever you may be I’ll share a ‘Ding-Dong’ or two with you when I see you again! xx


So the certainty is I can get no air,
Getting nowhere at all,
Open-ended and suspended one by one,
In the slipstream,
And Harvest hold the horrorbag,
Emotion starts to lag,
With panache I keep a-crashing,
Through the sky,
No compassion have I.

Kick a kiss of superstition and I cry,
“Just a guide or I throw
All the panic I can muster,
Threatening to the cluster”;
The hangman’s whore so obvious,
Discretion’s such a drag,
But I know his apparatus snows my mind,
When it gets too far out.

Guard the ribs and fall,
I long to catch my breath, condemn it all
As the number I become,
They count me out a volunteer.

See how they run in silence up the belfry steps,
Each unaffected by the sight of the blistered skin;
Someone to calm me till the pounding in my head stops,
Over the tens of thousands find no way out of in:
Through the pandemonium, My heart is beating like a drum,
Barricaded in here, crawlings getting creepier,
With my head in my hands, all the heaven in my heart.

Get me out of here, let me get away,
Let me go from here, get me out away,
Get me out of here, let me get away,
Let me out of here, let me go today


A little ditty….

Where do I start? This thing’s tearing us apart
Nothing is clear, where do we go from here?
No wonder in sight, not even the blackest night
So where do I start?
It only remains to empty this heart
Everything that I came to trust slipped away
I resisted the call to arms, feet of clay

Now when I sleep, I reach for the book I keep
In my hour of need
I turn to the pages no one will read
Everything that I came to trust slipped away
I live through this a thousand times every day

All the time that I’m held in suspension
And unable to make myself heard
I can’t hold back the tide of erosion
And the vision that haunts me is blurred

Been as cold as I can since who knows when
Would that I could feel now as I did then
Get in out of the light, avoid the glare
Lost and out on a limb, miles from anywhere

All the time that I’m held in suspension
And unable to make myself heard
I can’t hold back the tide of erosion
And the vision that haunts me is blurred

Everything that I came to trust slipped away
I resisted the call to arms, feet of clay
Everything that I came to trust slipped away
I live through this a thousand times every day

Just a thought…..

Life is short, live it.
Love is rare, grab it.
Anger is bad, dump it.
Fear is awful, face it.
Memory is sweet, cherish it.

Ringing in the changes!

“You can’t stop the future, You can’t rewind the past, The only way to learn the secret …is to press play.” – ― Jay Asher, Thirteen Reasons Why

Today is a very strange day. Not because it’s a Friday, not because it’s pay-day, not because I’m off out tonight. Today is strange for it’s day I move out of Base Camp and move it with Angela. I moved into Base Camp in November 2009, a tricky time when I needed a bolt-hole, a place to hide, a cave to lick my emotional wounds and decide what to do next. A place in darkness Radford may not sound like the best of places for that but in truth, I’d lived in the area before, had friends close like the Mozster, it was warm, clean and comfortable. The shops stayed open late, I had access to wireless internet, a good washing machine, a decent bathroom and much more besides. Yes, being away from Chris and Jack took some getting used to, but they were getting older and more independent anyway and so didn’t need me around in the same way they once did.

Over the almost four years I was there, I made a lot of new friends in the area, got a new local in the Pheasant (epic boozer), caught up with a lot of books I’d always wanted to read, watched the classic movies I’d never have gotten around to see otherwise and became a part of the community in a way I didn’t expect.

At the same time, something else was happening. My horizons in life were expanding. I started taking city breaks, going to gigs, watching Opera and going to the theatre. I started to live a little more and there was a catalyst for all of that and that’s Angela.

Life is replete with change, entropy ensures nothing stays the same for long and nor should it. As of today, the phase in my life where I live alone is ending. To say I’m excited by the prospect of this would be an understatement, it also frightens me that it’ll all go wrong and people will get hurt. That said, nothing ventured nothing gained so I’m going for it. Life is too short to worry too much. It may not work out, but I’m giving it a go with all my heart and love.

That said, I will miss the old place. It served me well, I had some good times there and will treasure some of the memories made there for a long time.

Check out the latest video from the Elite Dangerous peeps

So glad that I supported this Kickstarter, the Beta can not come quickly enough for me. Enjoy

Pinning for the Fjords, what type of talk is that!

Had a wonderful day in Stavanger yesterday, pictures to follow as Norwegians have no concept of free wifi and I’ve had no choice but to use the onboard Satellite connection to check for email etc. They said Norway was expensive and they were not joking! A cheeseburger at Burger King is £7! The old town was beautiful as was the dockside and the Water Gardens and it’s so very clean too but it’s mostly a modern city like any other. There are Bars, Restaurants, convenience stores etc. The language may be different but people are people and so their needs are basically similar. It’s also quite geared up for tourist and so was a little tacky in place, but commerce must have its place I suppose.

We docked at Flamm about 8.30am this morning, it’s at the end of one of the fjords and although it’s cloudy, wet and a tad cold, it is stunningly beautiful. The clouds hang over the forest as if the leaves of the trees are breathing out steam. Waterfalls leave trails of bare rock cut into the tall hillsides while small groups of houses sit scattered along the shore. The houses are mostly of wooden construction but all brightly coloured as if to contrast the green trees and grey stone of the fjord. The train station cuts what little town there is almost in half and while looking at it from the top deck of the ship, it reminds me a little of a model train set. I could almost picture the scene in an issue of Railway Modeller! It reminds a little of North Wales, with all the trees, bare rock and isolation. There’s no mobile phone coverage at all! None. The Immersat connection for the Internet is the only link out, the other satellite channels can not be received as the walls of the fjord block the necessary line of site so I have no idea of what might be happening back in old blighty.

I miss Chris and Jack, I wish they were here to enjoy the journey and experience with me. Hopefully that opportunity will come soon. Right it’s lunchtime and as all the food is included, I’m going to make the most of it and get even fatter (if that is possible)